Monday, April 14, 2008

Finally, some time to think

Its definitely been a while since ive written my thoughts down in here. This is mainly because of the month of April creeping up on me so fast, one moment its january and your freezing your ass off outside hoping for some work on your bike and the next thing you know your wearing shorts and hiding from the sun.
Ive been thinking about way too much and not writing it down, its all building up inside of me. Theres so many ideas and thoughts on things floating around inside my head but i cant pin one down for the life of me. Like earlier in this entry i wanted to ramble off into oblivion about the weather and how weve had 6 inches of snow this past winter but anywho... If you know me you can probably tell something is going on inside of my head at all times im just horrible at communicating it through the spoken word, which is why im surprised i dont do this more often. I often sit back and watch myself be discounted from intelligent conversations which i could add loads of feedback to, all because of the fact that i often dont speak up or I just can't seem to find the right words to convey my opinions well.
I know what it is, its this life/lifestyle i now live. Ive been pulled out of my comfort zone full of artisticly intelligent and genuinely caring people and thrusted into a world full of coked up alcoholics who would use anyone and anything to gain a step up. I am in almost no way like these people, we have our familiarities but these familiar traits bring nothing but a few good laughs and a sense that im missing out on something bigger.
I miss my artistic friends, all of you guys from CAPA who inspired me to use my talents as much as possible. It was like we were roommates for 4 straight years and all of a sudden we all split off in our own seperate directions. Even some of you are so close to me but i cant seem to find time for you all, we are suddenly on different pages and i badly wanna come back. Im glad i didnt lose my best friend through all this whom i met at CAPA and im super psyched for May because we'll be able to hang out in more situations than when i visit on the weekends which will be amazing for my creative side and the more frequent intelligent conversations may help with my scatterbrain at the moment. I cant really remember a time in the past year or so where ive been so excited, im even paying out the ass in taxes and im still excited.
This weekend gettin my chest tattoo outlined and Jenalees art show, hopefully get to see some old friends
Next week/weekend packing and trying to raise some extra money, ya know get shit together.
Soon enough the weekend after the 1st is move time and Bike swap stuff

soooooo excited, im gonna try and write more often in here, it really helps
Bye yallss

1 comment:

Jim Kauterman said...

Truck. You call when I've made plans... which hardly ever happens.

Try more often? See you at the filmfest.